Tuesday, June 8, 2004

Utah Camping Diary, Day 1

Tif and I are in Utah this week. We're leaving to go camping at Fish Lake -- about a five hour drive south of Salt Lake City -- bright and early tomorrow. Took a cab to the airport this morning ... the driver was hilarious. Nice enough guy, but not all there. First, there was the debate over the price of stamps he was involved in with his dispatcher and another cabbie. We set them straight on that. Not worried at this point, I mean, stamps are always going up two or three cents at a time. I wouldn't have guessed twenty-five cents, but hey, maybe he pays all his bills online, right? Next, he asked where we were going. Utah, we told him. "U-Haul?" he says, perplexed. No, Utah. "Yoo-hah," he says, "where's that? Nebraska?" Not exactly, Utah: U-T-A-H. "Oh, that's not in Nebraska is it?" No, we're going to the state. "Hunph," he says. I don't think he could imagine why anyone would want to go to Yoo-hah, NE this time of year. On the highway, he points out the sun for us. It's about an hour after sunrise at this point. "Look at that sun," he points, "it's sure orange." Yep, it is. We lose it behind the buildings of downtown Providence and the northbound lane of 95 for a while. He's craning his neck, bolt upright in his seat looking for it. When it's back, he points it out again. Gotcha, Chief. I'm getting a little nervous about how much he's looking at the sun, I mean, directly at the sun in relation to how much time he's spending looking at the freakin' road. I'm about to caution him about the possible eye damage you can get from staring DIRECTLY AT THE GODDAMN SUN FOR MORE THAN 30 SECONDS when he changes subjects. There's a new gas station chain, Valero, that has started advertising in our area and a few of the older run down gas stations have been remodeled to Valeros. He's way up on this. "How about those Vaheebos everywhere?" Vaheebos? "Y'know, the new Vanteebos ... V-A-L-E-E-R-I-O," thanks for spelling it, I'm regretting now that we clarified Utah for him. "The old lady likes the Vroom Vrooms in the commercials." I'm sure she does. The whole drive he was on one topic after another, making little to no sense on any of them. Spelling stuff randomly at irregular intervals. When we got to the airport, he thought he saw a plane with a new company name on it. I dunno, maybe he did, but I just wanted him to stop trying to crane his neck and jump up in his seat to to try and get another look at it over the Jersey Barriers. "You see that? What was that? A-T-W... something?"

Next update when we get back...

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